Wonder Women

You know if you look at 1940's Wonder Women Comics without reading the text it always looks like some kinky lesbian porn is about to start on the next page. Wonder Women was created by William Moulton Marston, a psychologist (Seeing that most other classic hero's were created by some working class 20-something Jewish guy just trying to make a living this is a bit of a outlier),Mr Marston seemed to have a particular and creepily interest in women being tied up as you can see here

Marston is also known for being the creator of a kind of blood-pressure test that has been used as to make the modern-day polygraph. He also though that women were more honest than men.

He also once said "The only hope for peace is to teach people who are full of pep and unbound force to enjoy being bound ... Only when the control of self by others is more pleasant than the unbound assertion of self in human relationships can we hope for a stable, peaceful human society. ... Giving to others, being controlled by them, submitting to other people cannot possibly be enjoyable without a strong erotic element"
Yeah Creepy......

RIP Billy Mays

It seems now that celebrity deaths come in five now. When I saw Billy on Conan a few weeks ago I was kind of disappointed that he was talking like a normal human being and all. I prefer to think of him as some sort of windup robot who when you start him up just yells "Hi Billy Mays here!"

The forgotten TGIF shows

Most people within the 20 to 30something age group grew up with the Friday night ABC sitcom block TGIF. Everybody knows (and makes the appropriate kind of ironic humor about) the famous TGIF shows like Full House, Family Matters, Boy Meets World, and most people also know of TGIF shows that were on a while but did not make that much of a pop culture impression (Im looking at you Step by Step). There were also shows that just lasted a few months and then were never talked about again. This will be the first in a series of blogposts about the forgotten TGIF shows!!! (Cue dramatic music)

1.

Going Places: This show that lasted from September 1990 till July 1991 Wikipedia says "The show's original premise was that four young writers, Chicago ad man Charlie Davis (Alan Ruck), his brother Jack (Jerry Levine), California native Alex Burton (Heather Locklear), and New Yorker Kate Griffin (Hallie Todd) were the writing staff of Here's Looking at You, a Candid Camera-type program featuring real people caught in their unawares. ". But all I remember from the show is that it was about grown up's doing boring grown up things and all I wanted from TGIF was to see shows with kids. (or in one case on Perfect Strangers a man-child).

I remember at one point they had the kid who later played Mark (the nerd kid) on Step by Step on the show(also playing the role of the nerd kid. I imagine that after Urkel nerd kid's were in high demand and ABC was just waiting for the right show to put this nerd kid on) . This show had the 9:30 timeslot after Full House, Family Matters, and Perfect Strangers. The show was canceled at the end of the season and ABC had to look for another show to bridge the gap between the family fun of the first three shows and the dark tabloid feeling of 20/20. (really I mean at 10 TGIF would end and kids everywhere would see "Tonight on 20/20 HORRIBLE MURDER RAPE DEATH!!!!!!!)

Double T's strange finds in the quarter bins 4

I found this oddity at 3 alarm comics in Biloxi. Only cost a buck and reprinted 4 old pre-code horror stories. First up was the Wall of flesh by Bob Powell. In this story some mad doctor has created this Living wall of flesh,that feeds on living tissue. He plans on using it for transplants and skin grafts. Of course in the end he gets eaten by the wall. The second story is Curse of Khar by the great Joe Kubert. In this tale two english crooks hideout in a house that is owned by a man of middle eastern desent. He predicts their future using a magic star. They freak out and pull one of his eyes outta the socket and kill him. They end up being chased by the magic star and in the end they drown in a river. The third one is The repulsive dwarf by Wally Wood. In this one is about an ugly midget that is in a carnival and tried to hook up with a hottie. Of course she wants nothing to do with him and hijinks ensue. Over all this was worth what i paid for it,mainly cause the Kubert and Wood art is great. One minor drawback is even though the orignals were in color this reprints them in black and white.

Double T's strange finds in the quarter bins 3

Published back in the early 90's this comic is the perfect example of WTF. The story,what little there is,goes like this. Little kid is in California with grandfather,Grandfather gives kid lucky coin. Godzilla comes busting outta the water. Everyone freaks out. Little kid runs into Charles Barkley and gives him lucky coin. This causes Barkley to grow gigantic. Barkley and Godzilla proceed to have a little game of one on one. Barkley dunks on Godzilla alot. Story ends with Barkley meeting up with Godzilla again to play more b-ball. What i wonder is does this mean that Barkley is stuck at this humongous size? And why did the lucky coin turn Barkley into a giant but didn't affect the little kid or the grandfather? I am thankful that i only paid like 10 cents for this one.

Top ten strange licensed products

9.

Home Improvement ... the Video game.

I have already written on this site about Home Improvement and the psychotic Tim the tool man Taylor (nickname fits) But after I heard about this game I have to write about him yet again. In 1994 A Home Improvement video game was released for the SNES.

The plot of the game is that Tim has to find some Binford power tools that seem to have gone missing from the set of Tool Time (most likely the fault of that dumbass Tim). Time looks for the tools and fights Mummies and Dinosaurs along the way WTF?
Yes The guy from the family sitcom fights Mummies and Dinosaurs. And to sum the game and the show up the game itself had no manual at all. It's splash screen just explains “Real men don’t need instructions.” ugg.

Looking back at the 16 bit era this game based on a sitcom is kind of a outlier (not Malcolm Gladwell), after all they never made a video game of Dannt Tanner or Al Bundy fighting Zombies.

No wrongs just right

Today I would like to talk about the popular restaurant chain Outback Steakhouse. I always wonder why the place is always so freaking crowded? People must think they are waiting a hour to eat authentic foreign Australian food (like steaks, shrimp, burgers etc) at a five star restaurant. Other chain places are sometimes crowded. But only Outback seems to be that way ALL the time. Even if they were open 24/7 I could see a person going in at 4am and still having to wait 20 minutes holding the light up coaster thing.

I still do not know why Outback of all chain restaurants that serve standard American cuisine has had this success. It has a tired "Australian" gimmick that was last seen in the 80's when America though that everyone in Australia lived in the outback and talked like Paul Hogan.

Also to help with the authentic Australian experience the butter knife they give you with your bread looks like it could kill a man. I guess in Australian people have huge knifes when they put butter on their rolls.

But the thing about Outback that puzzles me is that nobody really thinks that the food is "Australian" anyway yet that has to be the gimmick that has made it more successful that other chains. So it has kind of got a then un-tapped market in American that wants to pretend to eat Australian food. This makes them (And the Bloomin onion) American heroes.

top ten strange licensed products

10.Crash Test Dummies (Not the band that did the Mmmmmm song)

In the 1980’s and early 90’s The Crash Test Dummies was a PSA staring were Vince and larry two talking seemly alive test dummies who would tell us to buckle are safety belt. They would then get into a horrible accident and we would be told “You can learn a lot from a dummy buckle your Safety belt”.



For most PSA’s this would be the end of the story but a few years later I saw a commercial for Crash Dummies action figures.

I really want to know the inside story of how someone came up with idea of making action figures of characters invented for PSA’s .It would be like if they had toys of the drug dealer from the “Im not a chicken or a turkey” commercial.

The main gimmick the figures had was you could put them into cars and other vehicles and crash them and then the toys would have horrible injures where limbs would be flying everywhere. I always wondered if we were supposed to think that The Crash Dummies feel pain. If they don’t then what is the the point of them crashing all the time? And if they do then why should kids make them want to feel that pain? I mean they seemed like okay guys and all, I mean for dummies.

So to recap "Once their was this PSA that could'int go change with the girls in the change room and when they finally made her she became a action figure line.They couldn't quite explain the marketing logic behind that... MMMMMMMMMMMMM

Iran coverage on CNN

CNN sure likes to talk about Twitter talking about Iran. There is a guy they keep on showing on CNN who reads posts about Iran from Twitter. I wonder how many years he was in school for that. And a few hours ago CNN interviewed the women who played a evil Muslim mom on season 4 of 24. If only during the Israel/Lebanon thing back in 06 they interviewed Jamie Farr.

I was wondering what the 5 or so of you reading this would like from my blog? More strange cartoon/video game/ action figure-like lists? posts about international politics? Comic book stuff? random old fast food commercials? maybe looks into the scarcely parts of internet fandom?

Professor Xavier like's em young.

This is a panel from X-Men 4 back in 1964. After we find out that Xavier is in love with his teenage student , I guess Stan Lee and Jack Kirby figured that this storyline would not work and nothing was said about Xavier's love for Jean Grey for about 32 more years where they use it in the Onslaught storyline.

A look back at 1980's/1990's sitcoms part 1 Home Improvement

I was never really a big Home Improvement fan. For the 0 of you how have never seen the show It was about Tim Taylor and his family. Tim hosted a program called Tool Time but he was apparently so horrible at his job that he is almost killed on every episode of Tool Time. Tim also made strange growling noises when talking about man stuff like tools and sports and sometimes he would also make a confused puppy sound when he was sad or something.It is clear that Tim was a ticking timebomb who's recklessness as a TV handyman could one day get many people killed(he also needed to see a doctor about his grunting sounds) yet nobody tried to stop him.

The only way Tim could solve a problem in his life was talking to his neighbor Wilson who was the smartest man on the show. However Wilson never left his backyard and never liked to show his full face so it is clear he has issues also.Still Wilson should of been the star of the show after Tim blows up his whole family by mistake around episode 4.

The show was based on Tim Allen's comedy act that was basically like "Hey you know what Men hate? Opera! what is going on I don't understand it! But you know what men like? Football! (he then makes strange grunting sounds). Also in the late 70's Tim Allen used to sell cocaine and that makes me not a chicken but him a turkey. But being a Turkey has not stopped Tim Allen from having sitcom fame.

He also ratted out his fellow dealers to the fed's to get a light sentence after he was arrested. In my mind this makes me think of the lost potential of bringing that storyline on the show and having it turn out that Wilson is the father or brother of a dealer that Time Taylor ratted out to the fed's and he is waiting for his revenge.

John Byrne And Erik Larsen flame war 09

This just proves that Comic writers are about the same as the people who post on comic boards. For years Bryne and Larsen have feuded over something or other related to the first few years of Image Comics (and also Bryne is kind of crazy but not Dave Sim crazy) you can find their latest flame war here

I do not really get the point of twitter (meaning as far as any online social network has a point) I have one but I tend to not use it as much as I use Facebook. At least with Facebook when you write something people can write to your comment right below your post. On Twitter your wacky one line comment just sit’s there being lonely. There has been about three times in the last few months when somebody has asked what exactly twitter is. And I could say to explain is that it is like facebook with just the status updates. But the one good thing about Twitter is Shaq’s Twitter( http://twitter.com/THE_REAL_SHAQ) that I approve of greatly.

Double T's strange finds in the quarter bins 2

Ah Topps Comics,yes famous makers of all kinds of sports and non-sports cards actually tried their hands at publishing comics back in the early to late 90's.Most of their stuff was movie or TV adaptations,but one of the few original lines they put out was the so called "Kirbyverse". These are some of the last ideas put to paper by the late Jack Kirby. Bombast is my favorite of this line. He is a superhero with one of the lamest powers ever. He has super throwing power,which means he can throw anything really fast,really long and really accurate. And besides having a lamer power than Cypher he is also the only superhero i know of that had a crackhead for a sidekick. So between fighting off DTs the sidekick would help Bombast fight some of the weirdest villains ever. One of them Cal Cutta wears this purple armor with a reel to reel player on the chest. Think about that for a few minutes,a FUCKING REEL TO REEL PLAYER. What is the use in that? Sadly the Kirbyverse was basically still born,so there is only a few adventures of Bombast and his loyal crackhead sidekick.

You know the Spider-Man comic strip has always been kind of strange to me. The strip reads like a bad 1960's Marvel book. It says that Stan Lee writes the comic but who knows if it is handed off to a ghostwriter or something (I think I heard Stans brother Larry Lieber may write it). The comic strip usually consists of Peter Parker yelling at the TV and boring storylines that last for month's . The current storyline guest stars Wolverine but something is very very wrong with it.

Spider-Man is talking about how Wolverine "hates city's" I have been reading X-Men comics for a long time and I do not remember this. And Spider-Man is all acting like this is Wolvie's main personality trait or something.Also Is Spider-Man saying that rich Westchester county is not a part of "Civilization"?, What a NYC snob Spidey is.

(BTW it seems I lose two panels when this get's posted so click on it to read the whole thing)

How to be a manly man who cooks in the 1920's

The Edge of the American west site has found a great old 1920's cookbook on Google Books where you get great recipe's by people such as President Warren G "looked at the brother said damn what's next" Harding and other 1920's Politicians. It seems the book was about how men can cook and yet still be a man. You kind find a link to the Googlebook here

Double T's strange finds in the quarter bins

Crazy Man created by Neal Adams in the early 90's was one of the comics from Continuity Comics. Basic premise was Danny AKA Crazy Man was a insane man who when angry would Hulk up and become stronger and bulletproof. He is discovered by some old fuck that works for a shadowy black ops government group. On his first mission Danny manages to save the Old Fuck's daughter but at the same time pokes out her left eye. Sadly this series didn't last long. Volume 1 has 3 issues and Volume 2 has 4. Both runs are easy to find in the various cheap bins that litter comic shops all over the country.

Herb part 2

You know I don't think poor Herb even knew those two people....

Strangest cartoons 2 to 1

2.
Star Trek The Animated series.

This is the cartoon version of the classic Trek show during the period in-between the end of the original series and before they started making all those movies about old people in space. This show was reran on nickelodeon around 1986ish and it was pretty much the first Star Trek show I ever heard of and 3 year old me loved it (In fact it was a while till I found out that Star Trek was more than just a cartoon) . Oh I guess I could not really follow most of the plots but I liked that Spock and Bones always had blue shirts on and Kirk always had a oranage shirt. The show is strange because it seems to be for the most part forgotten from history but Im glad I saw it when so I knew who Sulu was at a very young age.

1.

Mork/ Mindy/ Fonzie/Laverne/Shirley/ army pig thing/pink dog show

Really WTF is this??? Some Mork and Mindy/Happy Days/ Laverne and Shirley thing!!! And they are in the army with a pig army guy! I think this just kind of speaks for itself.

Heathcliff and club music

"A new agreement between FitzRoy Media and Magic Lantern Ent. will find Heathcliff returning in various media ventures.

The joint venture was created to bring the iconic HEATHCLIFF brand into the 21st century with the development of animated and live-action programming for theatrical, television and direct-to-DVD releases worldwide. Targeting a broad adult, teen and tween audience, the new Heathcliff will focus on comedy set against a hip, club-music sound."

Becuase when you think Heathcliff you think club music.

Burger King herb ad's

In the mid-80's Burger King came up with a rather strange commercial campaign. It was based on making fun of some random made-up guy named Herb who has never been to Burger King. It seems that this fake American not going to Burger King meant that he needed to be mocked on nationwide TV.

Later Burger King send the actor that played Herb into various Burger King's and if a customer said something like "Hey your Herb dude" they got prizes. I like to think that The actor who played Herb was reluctant to give prizes and if a customer saw Herb in the middle of a Burger King Herb would start to run away and a chase inside that Burger King would follow. That last bit will always be the dream

X-men Forever

I read today that Chris Claremont is writing a new new biweekly Comic about his own version of X-Men where he left off in 1991 after he left the X-Men books after about 14 or 15 years. For some reason I find this very funny. I wonder if we will see pop culture references to MC Hammer and Twin Peaks and other things happening in 1991.

Links of the day

US and Cuba be talking??? here


Kimbo gets TUF here

Strangest cartoons 4 to 3

4. The new Scooby Doo movies
This show in the long running series of Scooby Doo shows is on the list because on every eposode of this series the show had special guests that helped out Scooby and the gang. Sometimes the guests were fellow fictional people like Batman and Robin but sometimes they were just animated versions of Mama Cass (no ham sandwich jokes people) and Sandy Duncan ( I know she was on the Hogan Family like ten years after the new Scooby Doo movies but I don't know what she did before then to be on this show).

Since we are on the topic of Scooby Doo I always wondered that since Scooby and Shaggy are such pussy's that they run into each other arm's when they hear the word "clue" why the hell are they even going around solving mysteries anyway? It is not like they have to do that by law. Im sure the two of they would like life much better if they just hung out at home and smoked up/ eat a few scooby snacks.

3.Beethoven.
Beethoven was the cartoon spinoff of the semi-popular movie about a Dog who was a St. Bernard who came to live with a family that included Charles Grodin and the nerdy kid from Step by Step. The cartoon also had Beethoven talk because I guess a cartoon dog who was the star of the show just barking would be kind of boring. And check out at the end when cartoon Charles Grodin get's all David from Alvin and the chipmunks with his "Beethoven!!!!!" oh that cartoon Charles Grodin will he ever win?